A 29-year-old woman has given birth to her own 'cousin' after agreeing to help in her aunt's 15-year fertility fight. Emma Vaughan, 29, donated her eggs to her 42-year-old aunt Sandra Barlow and uncle Chris and acted as a surrogate for the birth. Miss Vaughan has now given birth to a baby girl called Maia, who is her biological daughter but her cousin by law after Mrs Barlow applied for a parental order.
It brings Mr and Mrs Barlow's 15-year battle to conceive to an end. Their hopes of having a baby naturally were dashed early on when doctors told Mrs Barlow that her fallopian tubes had fused shut and had to be removed.
She was sent for a dye test, where dye is injected into the cervix and uterus to check the fallopian tubes. It showed they were completely blocked and she was operated on immediately. After she recovered, she and her husband, 50, decided to try IVF. In total they spent £40,000 on seven cycles over five years, with Mrs Barlow suffering two miscarriages.
Then in 2008 the couple from Maidstone, Kent, made the decision to seek help from someone in their family, namely their niece Emma. Mrs Barlow said: 'Surrogacy seemed like our only hope. I did some research and looked at a surrogacy agency website. 'I was in awe that people did these amazing things for complete strangers but I wanted to do it within the family. I started to think who in the family could help us. I'm not sure what made me think of Emma.' Emma is the daughter of Mrs Barlow's brother Jim but they lost touch when Emma's parents split up and she moved away to live with her mother. They were reunited 11 years ago after meeting at Jim's funeral and have stayed in regular contact since.
Mrs Barlow said she spent months agonising over whether she should ask her niece before mentioning it to her husband. She said: 'I could tell he was shocked but he said: "We've got nothing to lose". When I rang Emma she instantly said yes. I told her to take some time to think about it but she never hesitated.'
Shortly afterwards, Mrs Barlow joined a surrogacy agency for advice about what would be involved. The couple signed a surrogacy agreement with Emma, although these agreements are not legally binding. 'Sandra and Chris never put me under pressure. It was my choice, I knew I could do it'
Mrs Barlow said: 'We decided to use Emma's eggs as by the time we started I was almost 40. Generally the egg condition of a woman in her 40s is not as good as someone in their 20s. Emma also wasn't keen on taking the drugs she would need if my eggs were used.' In October 2008, Emma moved from her home in Peterborough to live with the couple. But it took 18 months and 17 attempts at insemination with Mr Barlow's sperm before she became pregnant in June 2009.
As Mrs Barlow cuddled her 13-month-old daughter Maia, she said: 'I can't thank Emma enough. What she has done for me is amazing. She put her life on hold for us for two and half years. 'She has given me the greatest gift in Maia. 'At first our GP told us to just keep trying before we were referred to a specialist. We saw four specialists in two years but with no luck until Chris said he wasn't leaving until they agreed to do something.'
Mrs Barlow, the manager of a catering company, said of her IVF attempts: 'Every day Chris gave me my hormone injections, put up with my mood swings and even let me sit with my feet up for two weeks each time I had an embryo transfer. 'It was very hard but we couldn't imagine our future without a child. Each time I convinced myself it was going to work but after the seventh cycle, we decided enough was enough.'
She and her husband, who is a sub-contractor, even considered adoption but were told by a social worker they weren't ready for a child. Mrs Barlow said it was very emotional when she first heard the couple might finally have a child. She said: 'Chris called me at work to tell me the news. I burst into tears in the middle of the office.
'The three of us went to every midwife appointment together. It was amazing to see our baby on the screen.' Emma gave birth to Maia four and half weeks early in February last year by Caesarean section. Mrs Barlow said: 'When I saw Maia for the first time it was so emotional. Maia is the double of her dad, although she does have Emma's hazel eyes. When Maia is older, we will tell her everything. We've never once considered not telling her. 'Emma will be Maia's auntie but Maia will always know how special Emma is.'
After Maia was born, Mrs Barlow had to apply to a court for a parental order, as current legislation in England and Wales means that, at the time of the child's birth, the surrogate mother is the legal mother. Emma, who met her husband Alan, 38, when she was seven months pregnant with Maia, already has three sons from a previous partner. She is expecting her fourth child in June.
She said: 'When Sandra called me it was a total surprise. I had no idea about her problems conceiving. 'Sandra and Chris never put me under pressure. It was my choice and I knew I could do it. 'When I was in the delivery room the doctor said to me, "You're about to become a mum". I just pointed to Sandra and said, "No, this is the mum. It's her baby".
'That is how it's been from the start. Even when Maia was born I didn't feel anything for her. I was completely detached. To me, it was just a job.'
Article: 6th April 2011 www.dailymail.co.uk
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