For me, my clock was ticking and I was nowhere near being settled. I was in the USAF for 5 years, got out at age 27 and began my transition into civilian life.
No easy feat when your life is literally structured and you were always told what to do.
I got a job, got laid off… housing market crashed… I was not able to be settled enough to bring a child into this life and financing for a donor and fertility process was not an option for me at the time.
I soon met my partner, who is a woman in the USAF. We both wanted kids. We also both wanted the same donor, so the children would be a “true” brother or sister.
As life happens, time passes and there I was 38 and no kids yet. My partner and I have been wanting kids for years but like I stated, we were not settled, (getting stationed here and there) especially not financially.
Fortunately, we were eventually stationed in the state of Massachusetts where I finally got a long term government position and it was “time” to get this cooking. Insurance in a wonderful thing!
They covered fertility and insemination for me up to 80% and for my partner covered 100%. So blessed.
So it begins.
We opt to go through the California Cryobank because that's where we are from. Buying 2 vile’s ($1800) from the same donor shipping it to IVF of New England here in Lexington.
The process for me and my partner was the same except, testing for me was more extensive. I was over the age of 36 and my partner was not.
You can read my full journey from beginning to birth here (so yes, this did work for me): http://www.rockthebabybump.com/intrauterine-insemination/
I will give you a brief overview of what I went through personally as a 38 year old woman.
The Fertility Hospital
To begin, I went through a myriad of consults with my doctor at IVF. She was so great! Understood every facet of what I was going through and helped with the insurance as well.
She basically was interviewing me to see if I was mentally ready for what I was about to do. Not only mentally but physically as well.
The point of all the tests was to make sure that my body (the foundation) was sound and healthy.
I had the normal pee test, blood tests, pap, internal ultrasound, cell DNA test etc.
Fortunately, I passed all tests with flying colors.
After my initial testing, I was given the information on the tools to monitor my peak ovulating days. I bought and learned how to use the Clearblue fertility monitor.
This was the biggest, most frustrating, learning curve to get over. I needed to read and re-read the directions on that device multiple times before attempting to use it. It took me 3 months to get my ovulating peak days down.
The drill was, once I was at my peak day (for me it was day 12) I was to call my IVF doctor and let her know. From there, I was to go in and proceed with the insemination.
The process itself, literally took about 20 seconds. She simply said, “I’m in the uterus and now I am injected the half milliliter of sperm.” That's it. Done.
Yet, I had the worst feeling because to me, that was too simple! I felt nothing and just had so many worries that this was not going to work out.
Could this be that simple? I asked my doctor this and she replied, yes and this is going to work!
I was a mess up until the call. For weeks I was in a state of worry. I told no one and talked to no one about it.
Within the first week after, though, I started to cramp whenever I picked up something heavy… like my daughter, who at the time, was just about a year old. (my partners IUI was successful and we were blessed with a baby girl)
While I was taking care of her, I would cramp. It felt like I was pulling a muscle in my uterus!
That was a major reason why I thought this did not work. Turns out, that was what's called, conception.
A few weeks later I got the call with a big congrats that I will be having a baby girl too!
What a wonderful journey we were able to go through. We both have 2 baby girls under 2 at the moment and love every minute!
My name is Toki, mommy of Anani and Azlyn :) Thank you for being a part of my little story… for me mothering will always involve long hours, heavy physical work and the type of worry that could bring down an elephant if put into a dart gun. I'm here to cultivate a sense of inner support to calm our mini little storms… you can read more about me and my family here www.rockthebabybump.com